Can you really keep your husband in permanent 24/7 chastity? First, let’s be clear about what we mean by this. What it means, literally is 24/7 control of your husband’s orgasm; what it means colloquially though, and what people take it to mean is permanent 24/7 orgasm denial.
And the answer is… yes. It’s possible. What’s more, I believe now it’s actually desirable. I’ll explain why.
Keeping your husband in permanent 24/7 chastity
is an act of deep love and devotion and, despite the outward face of it, is not cruel, dominant behaviour or hard-hearted. In fact, when your man is close to orgasm and is begging for mercy, it is very hard for the woman who loves him to say “no“; but say it she must if she wants them both to enjoy the full benefits of true, long-term strict orgasm denial.
The practical side of it is actually rather easy, especially if your man, like my husband, John, is as willing as you are to make it happen (as an aside, men cannot be forced into chastity and orgasm denial against their will, and pretending otherwise is the act of a simpleton, but there’s no denying there are degrees of eagerness – although it’s my experience that you can with coaxing and compassion, teach your man to embrace, desire and even crave permanent orgasm denial).
Anyway, to continue: the practical aspects merely require a secure and comfortable chastity device. John is in a Lori #2C which is secure (even though he is not pierced) and enables him to cycle and work out and essentially live a normal life while wearing it 24/7. Of course it’s not 100% secure — no device ever can be — but it’s secure enough that escaping from it would be difficult and not without pain or risk. In other words it is an exceptionally effective deterrent to his masturbating (which is the only way he could ever orgasm, because while I do use Tease and Denial on him, I am strictly in control).
But what about the other aspects? His need and desire to orgasm and your desire to experience than and to experience him making love to you.
Let’s take the second point first: a sufficiently lifelike strap-on is the answer here. They are not cheap, but a good one is, not exactly perfect, but is good enough. You get 99% of the sensations of his making love to you “properly” without allowing him inside you or risking his orgasm (you can have him do this while he’s still locked, you see).
And to answer the first part… I used to think permanent orgasm denial was too much to ask of either of you, because you’d both be missing out.
But since John and I have embarked upon a full year in denial for him, it’s become apparent that the pleasure for both of us in regular tease and denial sessions with no hope of orgasm until New Year 2012 is to all intents and purposes the same as the mutual pleasure we get from his orgasm. In other words, there is no longer a need for him to have them any more.
The upshot of this is clear: IF a strapon is good enough for you and IF the pleasure of Tease and Denial is enough for you both, then permanent 24/7 orgasm denial becomes not only possible but actually desirable for couples living the male chastity lifestyle. Because, for a man, knowing he isn’t going to get to orgasm properly ever again, nor indeed enjoy penetrative sex with you again… yet is still going to get the pleasure of making love to you with a strapon and enjoy the Tease and Denial sessions you treat him to, it is one of the most erotic things imaginable.